


Four/Five

by Markovia



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Alcohol, Birthday, Blood, M/M, Memories, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2017-05-07
Packaged: 2018-10-28 08:27:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10827540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Markovia/pseuds/Markovia
Summary: He's always alone, even on his birthday. He likes to think that things could have been different. Lots of things could have been different.





	1. This.

**Author's Note:**

> A melancholic one-shot for Izaya's birthday. 4/5. Hope you enjoy.

 

He often wondered what might have happened if their first meeting had been different. Perhaps if he had just dodged that initial punch and kept his knife in his pocket, maybe introduced himself, maybe then-

 

_“Hi, my name is Izaya Orihara,” he said, holding out a hand. “Your strength is impressive but I'd rather not be punched in the face, if that's okay?”_

 

Shizuo might feel a little embarrassed then and flush that delightful shade of red that happens when he’s flustered. Izaya slammed down another shot of vodka and motioned for two more.

 

_“Shit, sorry. I get tunnel vision when I'm angry,” he replied, rubbing the back of his bleached hair. He placed his hand into Izaya’s and shook it gently. Izaya could feel the strength behind those fingers even though the action was deliberately careful. “Shizuo Heiwajima. I know Shinra from way back.”_

 

_“Does he do unwanted experiments on you too?” Izaya asked, letting his hand fall back by his side._

 

_“Haha, yeah and then some. The little shit.”_

 

They could have had a decent time at school, maybe stayed in touch. Undoubtedly there would always be a rivalry but perhaps it could have been friendly rather than murderous. Maybe even- Izaya used to stop himself from letting his thoughts go down that route but there’s no point anymore. The past couldn’t be rewritten in reality, so why not let himself dream? Another two shots were quickly ordered.

 

_“You know I've always liked you,” Izaya said, peering at Shizuo from across the bar. “Ever since school.”_

 

_Shizuo placed down the glass he was cleaning, swung the cloth over his shoulder and stared back at Izaya with uncertainty in his hazel eyes. “I had an inkling, yeah.”_

 

_“So,” he continued, playing mindlessly with the fur on the cuff of his jacket. Anxiety twisted his guts, a very unfamiliar feeling for him. He’d dealt with the Yakuza, been in gang fights and sold information that could have cost him his life, none of which phased him in the slightest. Yet here he was simply telling someone he ‘liked’ them and his fingers were trembling like a frightened child. “What’re you going to do about it?”_

 

_There was a moment of silence between them as Shizuo leaned against the bar with both hands, bringing their faces only a foot away from one another. Hazel eyes searched burgundy ones for a long second and Izaya swallowed thickly but didn’t move away, he remained perfectly still so as to appear collected when really his heart was racing. The bartender’s mouth curved up at one side until his white teeth were showing._

 

_“I get off in half an hour,” Shizuo answered, pushing himself off the bar. He picked up another glass and grabbed the cloth on his shoulder so that he could continue polishing. “You remember where I live? It’s a five minute walk from here.”_

 

_Izaya nodded, a little too eagerly. “Mmhm.”_

 

_Shizuo reached into his pocket and fished out a set of keys which he then threw at the smaller man who caught them deftly. “Go wait there. I won’t be long.”_

 

_“Sure,” he said, pocketing the keys. He gulped down the rest of his drink and stood up from the barstool when Shizuo clicked his tongue to stop him._

 

_“And Izaya?”_

 

_“Yeah?”_

 

_“I want you naked by the time I’m home.”_

 

Izaya scoffed and rapidly gulped down the vodka. He felt very hazy by that stage, he never could handle his drink that well. But fuck it, fuck spending his birthday alone in this shitty dive bar dreaming about Shizu-chan. The bartender here didn’t look anything like the one he was imagining in his head. Izaya screwed up his face - the one here wasn’t even attractive enough to consider taking home that night. The information broker groaned and rested his head in his hands as his mind filled with other thoughts, thoughts that could have been memories if _only things had been different._

 

_“Fuck, Izaya, you feel so fuckin’ good-”_

 

Another drink. Perhaps they could have been together, rather than alone.

 

_“This is my brother. Kasuka - come say hi to Izaya!”_

 

And another. Perhaps they could have been happy.

 

_“I love you, Izaya.”_

 

The broker slammed his glass down on the bar and unsteadily headed for the door. Fuck everything.

 

-0-

 

It was a nice evening, the best one Ikebukuro had experienced in weeks, and thus Shizuo Heiwajima decided to take a walk after finishing his shift with Tom. It was warm but the dusk brought a humidity that would have been unpleasant had it not been for the gentle breeze cooling down the grateful city. The ex-bartender wandered around the streets aimlessly, simply enjoying the sights and sounds of his beloved Ikebukuro. It had been an unusually quiet day, he hadn’t even had to raise his voice let alone pummel anyone into the ground, so he was in a good mood. The blond raised a cigarette to his lips and drew in a sharp breath, allowing the smoke to fill his lungs. He held it for a moment then allowed it to plume from his mouth and it stretched out through the air in long, spindly tendrils. Despite its toxic nature, he thought the smoke looked pretty, especially under the pale hue of the streetlights and the moon. It was only when the fumes cleared that a familiar scent hit his nostrils. Almost instantly his mood dropped and his entire body tensed. Shizuo grit his teeth together, being careful to avoid chewing on the cigarette filter in his mouth. Where the fuck was that little shit? The blond stomped down the pavement with fists clenched at his sides and his eyes darting back and forth. Eventually his gaze honed in on the source of that vile stench and he growled under his breath.

 

Usually he would have relished the chance to kick the little shit’s ass out of Ikebukuro but it seemed more like a chore that night. It had been a good day so far and it was irritating to have that small bit of peace ruined. But that was Izaya Orihara all over, wasn’t it? Peace ruining, blood-sucking scumbag. The information broker was standing under a nearby streetlight with his back to Shizuo, decked out in his usual attire. How Shizuo despised that odd, fur-lined coat of his, he could barely look at parka jackets without flushing with anger these days. As he stormed closer, he noticed that Izaya was propping himself up against the wall of the building beside him and he was swaying slightly. The blond frowned and flicked his still-smoking cigarette through the grate of a drain before stopping a few metres away from the other man.

 

“Iz-a-ya,” he snarled, drawling the name in a way he knew the broker hated. Izaya jerked upright and started to turn to face him. “Didn’t I tell you to stay out of-”

 

“Shizu-chan!” Izaya exclaimed. He wavered slightly as he span on his heel to face the other man. When his face was finally lit up by the streetlamp, Shizuo frowned. His usually collected expression was slack, all the tension in his jaw was gone and his usually narrowed, calculating eyes were wide and glassy. “Isn’t it a mar- _hic -_ marvelous evening?”

 

Shizuo glared at the smaller man and folded his arms across his chest. Normally Izaya would have tried to throw a knife at him by now. “What’s the matter with you? You’re acting weird.”

 

The brunet giggled highly and suddenly lurched forward unsteadily. Shizuo jolted forward on instinct and grabbed hold of his collar so that he could pull him upright. Izaya was forced up onto his tiptoes and Shizuo shook him roughly back and forth a couple of times. The broker placed his hands over Shizuo’s and chuckled as he looked up at the furious face above him.

 

“Always so - _hic -_ mean to me, Shizu-chan,” he said, playfully.

 

Shizuo frowned and dragged him closer so that he could peer into his hazy eyes. Another smell hit him then, one slightly fainter than Izaya’s natural scent. He hadn’t noticed it at first because he was fairly used to that smell and assumed it was coming from one of the bars around.

 

“Are you drunk?” he asked, somewhat surprised. Izaya didn’t seem like the type to get blind drunk like Shizuo did, he was always so careful and plotting. Liquor wasn’t exactly well known for boosting intelligence or self-awareness.

 

Izaya nodded and a happy smile spread over his face. “Uh huh. Yes, yes, yep indeedy.”

 

“Fuckin’ gutter rat,” Shizuo grunted. He observed Izaya’s serene face for a moment, then released his shirt. There was no point in beating the flea when he was in this state, it didn’t really seem fair, even to him. “Go home.”

 

“But Shizu-chan,” Izaya whined. He stumbled slightly when the larger man let go of his collar and propped himself up against the wall. “It’s my birthday.”

 

The blond shook his head incredulously. The fleabag was actually pouting at him. He clenched his jaw tightly and tried to refrain from punching that stupid face until it was unrecognisable.

 

“And?” he retorted. “Why should I care? You want a card or something?”

 

The broker smirked and stood upright, hands moving to his coat pockets. His movements were sloppy but Shizuo had seen them before and knew what was coming. It only took the slightest glimmer of metal for him to grab ahold of Izaya by the front of his shirt and throw him roughly against the wall. The smaller man groaned when his shoulder collided with the brick and he collapsed onto the ground, knees buckling underneath him. The switchblade he had been grasping clattered to the pavement beside his splayed-out legs. Izaya reached out to grab it but Shizuo squashed his hand mid-motion beneath his foot. The broker gasped in pain as his fingers crunched loudly beneath the man’s shoe. He retrieved a different blade from his other pocket and flicked it open so that he could stab it into Shizuo’s calve.

 

“Fuck! What the-”

The blond growled and jerked back at the twinge. When he looked down and saw the knife sticking out of his leg, his eyes widened in rage and he leaned down so he could wrap a hand around Izaya’s throat. He dragged the smaller man up so that his feet were dangling freely in the air and smashed him back against the wall. The broker’s head began to spin when it cracked on the concrete and he let out a low moan.

 

“Sh-Shizu-chan,” he heaved, the sudden movement forcing him into some form of sobriety. He clawed at the hand around his neck and tried to dig his nails into the skin of his fingers. The beast was crushing his throat slowly and the pressure was growing unbearable. Izaya took in a wheezy breath and felt blood rush to his face. “Le-lemme go.”

 

Shizuo didn’t realise him but he did loosen his grip on his neck enough to suck in a much-needed breath. When the air rushed into his lungs he could feel pain where his windpipe had been partially crushed. It still hurt and the way Shizuo was holding him above the ground felt as if he was being hung in a steel noose.

 

“Do. Not. Stab. Me,” Shizuo spat, slamming Izaya back against the wall to punctuate each word. He shoved his chest over the other man’s and made sure to look him in the eye. There was a trickle of blood running down the side of Izaya’s face from where it had grated against the concrete and it stood out starkly against his pale skin.

 

The information broked gurgled, tasting blood in his mouth. His head was spinning due to the multiple collisions against the wall and the expensive alcohol still coursing through his veins. He laughed and let his head fall forward onto Shizuo’s shoulder, shoulders shaking as he continued to giggle. Of course he would meet Shizuo on his birthday, he thought, bitterly. No-one else wanted to spend any time with him - Shinra and Kadota were ‘busy’, his sisters clearly didn’t give a shit and he could hardly ask Shiki to go for a drink with him. Namie was her usual stoic self but at least she took a moment to spit ‘ _happy birthday, asshole. I hope you don’t have any more of them’_ at him before she left his office that day. For a while he debated gathering some of his female followers but decided against it, they would only irritate him in the long run.

 

To see Shizuo, to have him beating the shit out of him like he usually did after he spent most of the evening dreaming about sweet, toxic nothings - oh, how it made him _laugh_. His monster, his beast, it was always Shizuo, wasn’t it? The one constant in his life, the one reliable person, how absurd that it should be the man who hated him most! His laughter turned almost maniacal as he tried to keep himself from sobbing instead.

 

“Ah Shizu-chan,” he murmured, voice thick due to the impact to his head. The fingers scratching the blond’s hand slackened and stopped trying to tear into the thick skin. “Of all the people to spend my birthday with - it just had to be you, didn’t it?”

 

Shizuo frowned and his brows knit together in the centre of his forehead. The broker looked unusually pathetic and while he was still pissed off, his anger lessened slightly. With a grunt, he dropped Izaya back on the floor and took a step back. He placed a cigarette into his mouth and lit the end, observing the crumpled form on the floor with unease.

 

“Get outta here, flea,” he ordered, taking in a drag. “I’m not gonna kill you tonight - consider that your birthday present.”

 

Izaya pushed himself into a sitting position and leaned his back against the wall. The trickle of blood had turned into a thicker stream and was now covering the majority of the right side of his face. “That’s a terrible present.”

 

“Yeah?” Shizuo growled, flicking ash toward the other man. “Would you prefer a kick in the face?”

 

The information broker’s eyes glinted wildly and his smile widened until the larger man could see his teeth. For just a second his mind went blank of all calculations and, fuelled by alcohol and mild concussion, he spoke the truth. “I’d prefer a kiss.”

 

Shizuo choked on the smoke he was inhaling and started to cough uncontrollably. When the shudders calmed, he took a step toward Izaya and loomed over him. The angle was menacing, and while other would be shaking in their boots the broker didn’t look the least bit terrified. Izaya never had been afraid of him. How bittersweet that his enemy would be the only person to accept him as he truly was.

 

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he snapped, flicking his cigarette down onto the floor by Izaya’s feet. He crushed the smoking end under the toe of his shoe, then looked back at the man on the pavement. “Why the fuck would I-”

 

Izaya scoffed and pushed himself up off the floor.  Why had he asked that, he thought, why had that escaped his mouth? He needed to get away from the other man before he blabbed out anything else he might regret when the hangover hit in the morning. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He was a little unsteady but he managed to push past Shizuo and he began to head away from him down the road. The blond scowled and grabbed hold of his shoulder before he could move out of arm’s reach.

 

“Oi, where are you going?” Shizuo asked, irritated by the other’s unpredictability that night. Usually they would have fought, a chase would begin, then it’d all be over. Izaya wasn’t playing their normal game and it was frustrating him.

 

“Home,” the broker answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Why should I stay here? You’re just going to beat me up some more and frankly, I’d rather not draw this shitty day out any longer.”

 

“I only hit you ‘cos you stabbed me in the leg,” Shizuo replied, a vein throbbing visibly in his forehead. “Why did you ask me to kiss you?”

 

Izaya rolled his eyes and unsuccessfully tried to shake the blond’s hand off his shoulder. “Why do you think?”

 

It took Shizuo a moment to think of an answer to that question. Izaya despised him, why would he ask such a thing of a man he hated? “Because you’re trying to fuck with me.”

 

“Obviously. Who would want to kiss a beast like you?” Izaya replied, shrugging the shoulder that wasn't held down by the weight of the other’s hand. He didn't like the look on Shizuo’s face and tried to pull himself out of his grasp. “Look, Shizu-chan, I'm leaving just like you wanted. I'll go home and spend the last bit of my birthday like the rest of it - alone with a bottle of expensive liquor. So let me go.”

 

“You were alone?”

 

Izaya scowled - of course, he would pick up on that. “Going to insult me for having no friends? Because I-”

 

“No,” Shizuo replied, finally removing his hand from the smaller man’s shoulder. He placed both back into the pockets of his trousers and recalled his last birthday, which he had spent surrounded by friends. It wasn’t always like that. When he was a child he often spent his days alone, ostracised for being a _freak_. He imagined Izaya in place of him in a long-gone memory, sitting alone at the kitchen table trying to convince himself that he didn’t care. Shizuo almost felt sorry for the informant. _Almost_. “I just pictured you as a social butterfly. I'm sure you could have found some people to go out with.”

 

“No-one of any worth,” he muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

 

“It's your own fault for making cronies rather than friends,” the blond commented. He paused for a moment and looked Izaya up and down. The broker looked rather dejected at that moment and Shizuo found that he didn't like it. Part of him still wanted to beat the shit out of him but another was curious about something and he wanted to explore it further. “Hey, flea.”

 

“Wha-”

 

Izaya was cut off when he felt a set of hands press into his chest and he was once again thrown back against the wall. He barely had time to gasp before Shizuo’s lips covered his and started to move in a bruising kiss. The broker froze, eyes wide open, unsure of what the hell was going on. One of Shizuo’s hands had sunk to rest on his hip while the other leaned against the brick wall behind Izaya’s head. When the fingers at his hip clenched so that they dug into the bone, Izaya closed his eyes and started to move his mouth in time with Shizuo.

 

This was utter madness, he thought, he couldn't work out how the hell he got here. The beast’s lips were so warm and far softer than he imagined. Close up he smelled of cigarette smoke and some rich, earthy cologne which Izaya presumed Kasuka had bought for him. He could feel how tense Shizuo’s muscles were when he raised his hands to the blond’s chest - clearly he was trying to control his monstrous strength. Izaya smiled into the kiss. Shizuo had never once tried to control himself around him before.

 

Eventually, Shizuo pulled back and leaned over Izaya, propping himself up with the forearm resting on the wall. He was panting slightly and his lips were swollen from the intensity of his kiss. When he le looked down at the broker, the blond almost instantly regretted what he had done - Izaya was looking up at him with such bleary, hopeful eyes. All the informant’s usual guards were collapsing before him and the lazy, satisfied smile that stretched over his lips was the last thing that Shizuo could bear to see.

 

“There. You got what you wanted,” he breathed, pushing himself away from the wall. “Now go home, you drunkard. Next time I see you I'll kick your fucking head in, okay?”

 

Izaya tried to set his thoughts straight but he was bizarrely dizzy and it didn't seem to be solely because of the alcohol. He managed to grasp the back of Shizuo’s vest before the man could walk away and he jerked him back as best he could. The blond turned with a scowl.

 

“What?” he growled.

 

Izaya wanted to ask him if he ever thought things could have been different between them but his pride stopped him at the last second and the question died on his tongue. Instead, he tilted his head to one side and a forced, familiar smirk rose on his face.

 

“Come home with me.”

 

Shizuo’s eyes bulged in their sockets and his mouth hung open in surprise. “What?”

 

“ _Please_ ,” Izaya ground out, abandoning his snide remarks for once in the hope that sincerity might buy him one night without the sensation of being utterly alone in the world.

 

“Why?” Shizuo asked, brows knitting together.

 

Izaya sighed in aggravation and pinched the bridge of his nose. The stupid beast was asking too many questions, why couldn't he just do what he wanted with his mouth shut? “Do you even give a damn why, Shizu-chan? It's my birthday, I'm slightly drunk and I want to fuck something.”

 

Shizuo glowered at him but didn’t turn away. For a second, Izaya thought he was going to accept his offer and he felt his heart leap into his mouth. Things could still change, they could still be different and _good._

 

“Go home,” the blond sighed, looking down at the pavement. He slid his hands into his pockets and turned away. “I only kissed you because you were tryin’ to fuck with me.”

 

“That’s a lie,” Izaya said, softly. He took a step forward and stretched out a hand but Shizuo was already walking away.

 

“Don’t think it means anything, flea. I still fucking hate your guts,” he called back. He raised a hand as a parting wave before shoving it back into his pocket. “Happy Birthday Izaya. I’ll be sure to kill you next time.”

 

The informant watched him until he turned the corner at the end of the road, a pained expression on his face. He let out a half-laugh, half-sob and turned around so he could head in the opposite direction. Angrily, he wiped away the tears in his eyes before they could leak out onto his bloody cheeks. It was far too late for anything to change. This was the course they had carved for themselves, there was no veering off now even if he might desperately wish it. There was only one option left.

 

“Not if I kill you first, Shizu-chan,” he hissed, clenching his fists at his sides. “Not if I kill you first.”

  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Or that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I couldn't resist another chapter. This is another moment that could have happened, one a little happier than the last. It picks up 3/4 of the way through the last chapter and shows a different outcome. I've had to bump this fiction up to Explicit for...obvious reasons.

“Come home with me.”

 

Shizuo’s eyes bulged in their sockets and his mouth hung open in surprise. “What?”

 

“Please,” Izaya ground out, abandoning his snide remarks for once in the hope that sincerity might buy him one night without the sensation of being utterly alone in the world.

 

“Why?” Shizuo asked, brows knitting together.

 

Izaya sighed in aggravation and pinched the bridge of his nose. The stupid beast was asking too many questions, why couldn't he just do what he wanted with his mouth shut? “Do you even give a damn why, Shizu-chan? It's my birthday, I'm slightly drunk and I want to fuck something.”

 

The blond glowered at him but didn’t turn away. Izaya stretched out a hand and although there was a smirk pulling at his lips, Shizuo could see desperation in his eyes. He didn’t understand this man, he never had and he imagined that he never would.

 

“But - you hate me,” he blurted out. His brows knitted together in confusion. “Why-”

 

“Do you ever think things might have been different?” Izaya interrupted, placing a hand against the side of his. He patted the wound there gently then drew his fingers back so he could observe the blood staining his fingertips. It was a vibrant crimson and slightly sticky, it clung to his skin. He focused on the red rather than looking at the other man. “If we hadn’t started fighting, do you think we might’ve been friends?”

 

Shizuo was surprised by the question, especially coming from Izaya. “I think we would have fought even if we were friends.”

 

The broker laughed and lowered his hand back to his side, gaze now shifting to Shizuo. He smiled and the blond was surprised by how delicate his face looked when it was clear of his usual arrogance. “That seems likely.”

 

“There’s no way we could have been friends, flea,” Shizuo stated. He took a step back toward Izaya, peering down at him. “You're too much of a weirdo.”

 

“Says the man who can rip streetlights out of the ground with one hand,” he replied. The genuine smile curved up into a smirk again. “You're probably right though, we could never have been friends.”

 

Shizuo opened his mouth to reply when Izaya cut him off.

 

“Still, despite hating your guts I can’t imagine life without you,” he continued, musing half to himself. “It’s strange and stupid and disgusting but I need you. Life would be far less interesting if you didn’t exist.”

 

The information broker smiled and nodded thoughtfully, before letting out a small chuckle. Shizuo didn’t quite know how to respond to that odd confession. What would life without Izaya be like? There’d be more peace, that’s for sure. Izaya’s presence had been an utter nuisance throughout the years but there was never a dull moment. In a bizarre way he actually enjoyed their fights, it was exhilarating to find an opponent who could best him with such apparent ease. Perhaps he too  _ needed  _ the flea. The two of them were so well balanced, their physical and intellectual strengths matched with their weaknesses to create the perfect storm. Without the other, they would be strange, terrible creatures - alone in a world full of people who would never accept or understand them. Izaya was one of the few people who witnessed his monstrosity in its most vicious form and didn’t care, if anything the informant encouraged him to bare his fangs and continue the chase.

 

“I’ve grown to love hating you,” Izaya said, softly. “And I hope you never stop chasing me, Shizu-chan.”

 

With a growl, Shizuo lunged forward and caught the broker’s already stretched-out collar in his hand so that he could drag him closer. Fuck it, he thought, he was going to hell anyway - he might as well have some fun on the way. The informant made him go crazy, therefore he blamed a form of temporary madness as the force driving his actions that night. Blaming something made the ache in his chest easier to ignore. That familiar grating laugh bubbled for a second before Izaya’s lips were smothered by Shizuo’s and the sound was swallowed. Their mouths barely separated until Shizuo shoved him back against the wall of his apartment, slamming the door behind him. He yanked Izaya closer and caught his lips again, hungry for the sweet taste on the informant’s tongue. The man groaned and clutched Shizuo’s upper arms tightly, nails pressing painfully into his skin. As the blond’s hands wrapped around his waist, Izaya’s fingers danced over his broad chest, deftly flicking open the buttons of his shirt. They both pulled back for air, still partially undressing the other.

 

"This is the only time," he panted. He wrenched the informant’s black shirt over his head as Izaya pushed his off his shoulders. He quickly stripped off the other’s jeans and boxers, letting them flutter to the floor beside the bed. The smaller man’s fingernails raked down his chest, leaving thick red lines on his skin. Shizuo moaned and pulled him closer by yanking on his throat. "Uh, fuck Izaya-"

 

"Never again," he agreed, voice croaking slightly under the pressure of his chokehold. "Tighter."

 

Shizuo's eyes narrowed. He dragged him into the bedroom and pushed him backwards until they both fell onto the bed, him straddling his waist. The hand on Izaya’s neck tightened until the man gave out a strangled moan of pleasure. As soon as his hands moved to touch Shizuo’s fingers, he released his grip, not wishing to strangle the life out of him for once.

 

"Breathe," he said leaning back on his heels. Izaya raised an eyebrow and propped himself up on his elbows as he drew in a wheezy, shallow breath. "I said, bre-"

 

He was cut off when Izaya slapped him hard across the face. Before he had time to look back at the other man, he had swiped his hand back, striking his other cheek with just as much force. The blond fell to one side, rolling onto his back next to Izaya who quickly took the upper hand and straddled his hips. With a chuckle, he placed his hands on either side of Shizuo’s head and leaned down, so their noses almost touched. There was a flush across Shizuo’s face that hadn’t been there before and when he let out a breath Izaya could hear it shaking.

 

"Didn't peg you for a masochist, Shizu-chan," Izaya hissed, gripping the other man’s chin in his hand.

 

Shizuo let out a breathy chuckle. Seeing Izaya above him, so fucking arrogant and disgusting and so  _ powerful _ \- fuck, he could barely control his lust. "It's exhilarating."

 

The informant laughed. He sat upright, taking Shizuo with him, and whined when the blond dragged his nails down his chest. Izaya groaned softly as he circled his nipple with a barely-there touch.

 

"Although," Shizuo added, smirking. He pinched the smaller man’s nipple between his thumb and forefinger so hard that he let out a loud cry of pain. After a moment he released it and began rubbing it gently, laughing darkly. "It isn't quite as exciting as giving it."

 

Izaya grit his teeth together as the beast applied the same brutal pressure to the other nipple, not wanting to scream a second time. Shizuo seemed to notice and tutted at him.

 

"Come on now, flea," he whispered, kissing the skin of his throat gently. "Scream for me, you know I love it."

 

"F-fuck you," he panted, body twisting in pain. Shizuo chuckled darkly and latched onto Izaya’s neck, his strong teeth cutting deeply into the skin there. He pinched both of his nipples roughly and began to pull. The combined feelings were too much for Izaya to handle and he began to groan loudly in pain. "Shizu-chan, ugh fuck, Shizu-chan-"

 

The blond withdrew from his neck and dropped his hands from his reddened chest. The look on his face when he took in Izaya’s pained expression was feral.

 

"Do you even know what you do to me?" he asked, voice dark and low. Izaya couldn't decipher if the beast meant here, in that moment or more generally. Perhaps Shizu-chan wanted this as much as he did, despite his initial dismissal. He grabbed the back of his head and tugged on Izaya’s glossy black hair. "Mine."

 

The word registered briefly in Izaya’s mind before Shizuo’s lips crashed back down and addled his thoughts. As their mouths moved roughly against one another, the broker began to grind his ass down into the blond’s lap. The effect was marvellous - Shizuo bucked his hips up involuntarily and let out a low moan into the other man’s mouth. Halfway through that broken sound Izaya sucked his bottom lip between his teeth and bit down softly. Another delightful groan rumbled in Shizuo’s chest and the informant dragged his nails down the skin there, over all the scars and wounds he’d left there over the years.

 

“F-fuck, ‘zaya,” the blond breathed. He wrapped his hands around Izaya’s hips and span them around so that he was on top, between the informant’s pale thighs. Gently, he pushed on one of the man’s knees so that he had space to dip down and wrap a hand around the base of his cock. Izaya gasped at the sudden contact and his hips jerked upward until Shizuo held him down.

 

“Stop squirming,” the blond growled. He moved down, biting a trail down Izaya’s thigh until he wrapped his lips around the leaking head of his length. The informant shuddered under him as he began to work his mouth up and down, tongue swiping at the skin firmly.

 

"Fuck," Izaya groaned, grabbing a fistful of his hair. "That feels, ah - good!"

 

It had been such a long time since Izaya had done anything like this that it didn’t take long for him to feel his climax approaching. The beast made intentionally obscene slurping noises and made eye contact every so often, driving Izaya mad. Fingernails were busy scratching and tugging at his legs, leaving thick red marks and crescent shaped dents on the trembling limbs. Shizuo's fingers sank into the skin of his thighs, holding his legs apart as he came and they threatened to tighten around his head. After the rush of pleasure faded, Izaya’s body went slack against the duvet and he desperately tried to suck in some much needed breaths to clear his dizzy mind. The blond didn't wait long before lurching up over Izaya’s torso and crashing his lips onto his. Izaya grunted and raked his hands through the other man’s hair again, tugging on it roughly. Shizuo leaned back, groaning happily.

 

"Fuck I love it when you-" he began. He was cut off when a hard slap landed on his cheek. Before he could look back, Izaya’s fingers clasped his jaw and pulled his lips back down into a kiss. Shizuo moaned against the other man’s deft mouth, allowing his tongue to slide between his teeth. Eventually, Izaya drew back, his head falling onto the duvet.

 

"You do not _ love  _ anything about me. Stop saying that," he hissed, breathlessly. "I want you to fuck me. Hard."

 

Shizuo leaned away from him, falling back on his knees. He swiftly unbuttoned his dress trousers and pushed them and his boxers past his hips.

 

"Ask me again," he ordered. He took his length in his hand and began to stroke it slowly. The way Izaya looked up at him, his warm thighs around him and his red-tinted eyes hazy with lust- he thought he might burst there and then. "Tell me how much you want me."

 

Izaya stared at him silently for a moment, then his face broke out into a soft, genuine smile. The expression surprised the blond somewhat, he had been expecting some sort of flippant comeback. The broker reached up and grabbed the ends of his undone tie, then used it to pull him back down on top of him. His thin arms wound around Shizuo’s back and one hand settled into his hair. The larger man sighed at the feeling of Izaya beneath him, enjoying the intimacy of the comforting position.

 

"I want you, Shizu-chan," he said, voice low. The man tilted his head slightly, then leaned up to press a soft kiss against his lips. "But if I don't get fucked right fucking now I will stab you in the neck."

 

“Didn't I tell you not to stab me?”

 

“Did you think I would listen?”

 

Shizuo smirked and thrust into him roughly, groaning as his warm insides surrounded him blissfully. With his hands placed on either side of Izaya’s head, he sunk down onto his forearms, wanting to place his lips against the other man’s once more before he began to move. His strokes were hard, as hard as Izaya had imagined them to be and deep enough to hurt slightly.

 

"I-," Shizuo panted, rocking his hips up sharply to keep up the depth he was hitting. "Fuck this is crazy."

 

Izaya laughed lightly and dragged his nails across the back of Shizuo’s neck, causing him to gasp. He shuddered and bit down harshly on the side of the other’s throat in return. The smaller man's hips rolled underneath him and he let out a loud noise of satisfaction, clearly enjoying the sensation. His insides tightened around him.

 

"Oh fuck, you fucking stupid m-monster, ugh-  I'm going to-"

 

"No - not yet, flea. Hold it," Shizuo growled, one hand moving to encase his neck. Izaya snarled but tried his best to stave off the impending orgasm, concentrating on his breathing rather than the overwhelming pleasure. The blond smirked, kissing his forehead in some mocking form of intimacy as he thrust into him hard enough for Izaya to let out a gurgled moan. "Good boy."

 

"F-fuck you, Shizu-chan-" he panted, his fingers gripping the other man’s shoulders as if holding on for dear life. Izaya ran his hands down the muscles of his torso greedily, fingernails digging into his pectorals, leaving tiny crescent shaped marks in their wake. The larger man snarled and sat up slightly, gripping Izaya’s thighs in his hands so that he could hoist his legs onto his shoulders. With his body at this angle, Shizuo could fuck him cruelly, relentlessly hard, hitting him in the right place constantly. Through his foggy vision Izaya noted how handsome he looked - his body was lean but muscular, constantly tense as if he were ready to attack and rippling with the immense strength he was constantly trying to control. His face was angular, shadowed in the evening gloom and his glaring, hazel eyes that sent a shiver down his spine - they emitting such raw power, such devastating hatred, that Izaya couldn't help feeling in awe of him. He was everywhere, smothering his skin, forcing his way into his mind, biting down hard on his neck until he felt the skin break under his sharp canines. Shizuo drew back to look at him and smiled, his blood slathered over his lips and chin like the perverse, arrogant, monster that he was-

 

“Shizuo,” he groaned, tightening his grip on the sheets beneath him. “Fuck,  _ Shizuo. _ ”

 

"God, Iz- _ ah _ -flea, come right now," the blond demanded, feeling himself tip over the edge. As Izaya began to clench rhythmically around him, Shizuo’s face twisted into a look of pained pleasure, mouth hanging open, eyes tightly screwed shut. He shuddered as he came inside of the other man and rested back down on his forearms, with his head nestled in Izaya’s neck. For a brief moment, there was nothing but their satiated gasps, which grew slower and slower, until their normal breathing pattern resumed and their hearts stopped pounding at a manic rate. Shizuo rolled onto his side and rested next to Izaya. Tentatively, he curled an arm around his stomach and rested his head in the juncture of his bruised neck. Izaya circled his shoulders and pulled him slightly closer, allowing him to settle on his chest. The informant smiled and threaded his fingers carefully through his hair, stroking it softly.

 

"When we wake up we’re going to have to go back to killing each other," he murmured. He felt Shizuo smile against his skin.

 

"Yeah, I know," he answered, chuckling lightly. He peered up at Izaya and his grin widened to reveal his teeth. "You best pray you wake up first.”

 

Izaya laughed and rested his head back against the pillow, looking up at the ceiling. Slowly, he closed his eyes and simply allowed himself to enjoy the warmth of Shizuo’s body curled up against his own. This is what it could have been like, he thought. A wry smile slid across his face. "Yeah, yeah. Be quiet now, Shizu-chan. I’m exhausted."

 

“Happy birthday, by the way.”

 

“I said be quiet.”

  
  


  
  



End file.
